Fletcher among nation’s fastest growing tech colleges
December 20, 2011
Mandry J. Bourgeois Sr.
December 22, 2011
Well, it’s that time of the year.
The time for Christmas trees, bright red and green lights and family warmth and togetherness.
The time for gifts, hugs, candy canes and mistletoe.
It’s the time for people stressfully last minute shopping for the perfect gift, going home and even more stressfully wrapping said gift, then turning around and giving it to a loved one with a smile.
I don’t need to say the rest, you already know the story, heck yeah, it’s Christmas time and I, for one, know I’m in the holiday spirit this year.
I’m not from the North Pole.
I’m not even from north Lafourche Parish, I’m about as south as they come.
But that doesn’t mean I can’t be Santa Case for this holiday season.
So with that in mind, I am going to deliver the best gift I have, the gift of swag.
Here are my poems, all from the heart, to the good and bad boys of the sports world this holiday season.
They will all rhyme and they will all make you forget that big man with the puffy white beard, at least for a minute or two anyway.
The Bad List
David Stern
Oh little Davie, what a bad boy you have been!
Just look at the chaotic mess the Hornets were in.
You say you want to keep our team here, that’s a plus.
To do that, how could you not see trading Chris Paul was a must?
You’re an executive, not a GM, so little Davie, know your role,
Leave all future decisions to Dell Demps, all you get is coal.
Ndamukong Suh
This one’s a toughie, because sometimes you’re awfully great,
But what you did on Thanksgiving young Suh may forever seal your fate.
Stomping on an opponent in the heat of the battle? That’s tough.
Then not saying you’re sorry, that’s just downright rough.
Getting in a wreck and lying to the cops, you’re becoming a trip.
You get nothing this Christmas, instead get a grip!
Jason Garrett
This one’s personal for Santa Case, I love me some Dallas,
But Jason Garrett is ruining a beautifully built palace.
One week he ices his own kicker, the next he fumbles the clock,
My, my, my, I’m selling all my red-headed coaching stock.
You might get a second season, but that’s not my desire.
Jason, oh Jason, how I’d love to see you get fired.
LeBron James
The mighty king is again on the bad list where he’s beginning to linger,
He’ll be there until he gets a ring on his finger.
Bron, you took the easy way out and ran to Miami, like a chump,
But guess what, Your Highness, you still didn’t get over the hump.
I’ve never been a fan, so from me you can’t expect much,
Hey, it could be worse, it could be your fourth quarter touch.
Nick Saban
And last, but not least, that dog-gone Alabama coach,
Otherwise known in Louisiana as a sleazy cockroach.
You chose the Dolphins over LSU, heck, little Nicky, that’s fine.
But to everyone here, just know you’re the lowest level of swine.
You got the rematch you didn’t deserve, so puff out your chest,
But be ready, because the Tigers are going to lay your season to rest!
OK, OK, enough with the bad boys — they are just totally ruining my Christmas spirit. And we can’t be having that happening, right? So with that said, let’s forget coal and naughty and shift to those who have been on their best behavior. These people are far more fun to talk about – these people will enjoy nothing but the finest gifts from Santa Case this holiday season.
The Good List
Tyrann Mathieu
He takes what he wants, so ol’ No. 7 needs nothing from me,
But that pesky Honey Badger is absolutely something to see.
Mathieu fell short of the Heisman, maybe next year.
That he’s just a sophomore is truly a source of fear.
He’s forcing fumbles and making plays at just an unbelievable clip,
So my gift to you, Honey Badger’ is a BCS National Championship.
Gibby Talbot
The Ellender giant has certainly been good in 2011,
His progression on the hardwood floor has the Patriots in basketball heaven.
Santa Case saw Gibby in 10th grade and didn’t think he’d see the day
That the Patriots’ giant was shrugging his naysayers away.
But that’s what’s happening now, a testament to hard work and determination.
So on this Christmas, I proclaim you among the best prep centers in the nation.
Jimmy Graham
What else is there to say, dude gives opponents downright despair,
Watching him get guarded by linebackers, that’s just not fair.
Did you know Jimmy played basketball in college? How could one not?
That line is uttered in every, single Saints television spot.
But despite the repetition, the fact remains the same,
Jimmy, you get nothing, because you’ve already got game!
Terry Washington
I know, I know, this was another 0-10 season,
But listen to Santa Case, Patriots fans, I’m the voice of reason.
Washington is a great coach, probably a better man,
He’s the best coach for the school, the man with the plan.
Sure, the Pats didn’t get a W, so the record stays the same,
But I guarantee you in 2012, Ellender’s winning a game.
Sumar Leslie
Last on our list this year, it’s that Nicholls State point guard,
Who on this Christmas deserves a very special reward.
Leslie is pushing the Colonels hard into Southland play,
This year, it doesn’t seem like Nicholls is going away.
With Leslie and a solid pre-conference record, the chances are great,
That Santa Case will bless the Colonels with a spot in the Southland’s Top eight.
Merry Christmas to all! God Bless!
